For myself only

It’s amazing how self serving this country has become. Everyone is obsessed with what things can do for them. How can it improve them in the eyes of the “community”. Everyone, basically, is selfish. I know I am not making friends with all these posts and fuck you if you are offended. No one can understand where I am coming […]

Hopes

You know you can hope for something so much that you think it can become real. You can picture it in your mind. You can feel the way it would impact your life. You can really believe it will happen. But then it doesn’t. And you come back to earth. And you realize you are the same person you were […]

books about selling your art

I have read a lot of books on art sales these past couple of weeks. Obviously, I want to sell my art and I don’t see anything wrong with that. But what I have not taken into account, at the stupidity of myself, is that the authors themselves, are not successful artists. They have taken a mass of artists striving […]

they can’t know

People who support you when you have a mental illness do their best. They try to support you as much as they can. But at the end of the day they don’t know what it’s like. To be disabled and not a member of society. To be at home all the time because you can’t interact with people. To feel […]

going under

The darkness returns. It is heavy and thick. It is not retreating. It casts its shadow without a sun to break through. Always there, but now it grasps at my soul. It is back again and is hungry. It wants to feed on my mind. Its jaws clamp down, my brain runs with sadness. Thoughts of pain and loss bleed […]

got life?

We all have it. It is what we do with it that matters. I have lost half of mine to pain, confusion, darkness, death, psychotic breaks. I should be mad. I should feel sorry for myself. There was a point in which I thought I could not go on – nor wanted to. I should grieve the life I could […]

ocean

Ask someone what the first words that come to mind when you say “ocean”. Waves, beach, fish, sun, water, salt, boats; and maybe for the more progressive minded folks out there – erosion, oil spills, extinction, pollution, etc. When I think ocean, I think of the collective consciousness of the people on earth. The individual streams all leading to the […]

the world

Ignition sequence start. It looks so beautiful up here. The oceans glow. The cities pulse with yellow energy. The mountains separate the land. There is no war. There is no hatred, no discrimination, no brutality, no countries, no judicial system, no racism. We are all just inhabitants. Here for a blink in the universe. Our lives a spark in time […]

inferno

My heart is filled with anger. My actions fueled by hate. My eyes are tinged with pain. Why am I cursed? Why am I afflicted with this possibly deadly illness? What did I do to deserve this life of constant struggle and grief? Those are just the cards I was dealt. You can’t ask for a reshuffle. There is no […]

images

Our day is filled with an onslaught. We are bombarded with life. Even more so we are bombarded with how terrible our life is compared to others. Spend any time on instagram or facebook and see how often you get down because you are seeing snapshots of someone’s “best life”. How does your life compare? How does someone have so […]